Nesting

So I have been back home a week now and it is so good to be home.

I am a nester. I am someone who has moved quite a bit in the last 6-7 years of my life. And as soon as I move in somewhere I immediately start to put up pictures and carve out my little niche in whatever space it is that I now inhabit at.

I have to feel comfortable and at home. I have realized how important it is to me to have that space that is mine. A place that is just somewhere where I can be quiet.

I have a crazy job, that I love. Work has been really crazy lately with normally three people handling our work load and now down to one, that one being me :)

Usually when I have a crazy hard day from working all day with kids that have been sexually abused I just work out or vedge or do something. But have not really been afforded that luxury as of late due to numerous crazy factors. Which has made me crazy :) As my roomie can attest too.

But in this time of stress and being stretched, I have realized how important it is to take care of myself. To carve out that moment if that is all I have for quietness where I can get refreshed from my Father who whispers in my ear, "you will be alright, we will make it through this, I promise. I have behind you, before you, and all around. I surround like light. I am your creator," and I take a deep breath and know that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, and I just take one step forward knowing that I am on the right path, even when the waves rage and crash around me.

I will make it. :)

Away from the Nest

So I am St. Louis, MO right now at a training and I have realized a few things about myself.

I got here Sunday and leave tomorrow and let me just tell you a few things about what I have noticed.

1. I do not like being somewhere, where I do not have a car.

2. I do not like being in an area where I don't know where I am. I feel a little bit vulnerable and fragile.

3. I in general do not enjoy traveling by myself, does this make me not enjoying being by myself? No not at all, in fact I rather do enjoy my alone time. But not when I am away from my comfort zone or just that sense of familiarity. Its just more enjoyable to overcome traveling obstacles when you have someone next to you to say, "hey what do you think should we do a. or b.?"

4. I like being home and not in a hotel room.

I have done pretty well actually enjoying my free time here then I did at my last training when I was in Minnesota last year. I have ventured walking around the city and have loved being in the very green parks they have here in St. Louis.

I also love the humidity here, the first day I was here and walked outside the sweet smell of moisture was like honey. I was on the phone last night with a dear friend and told her that that humidity made my hair crazy curly. She laughed and said, yeah like your hair isn't already crazy curly. But the humidity has made it even more curly, if that is possible ;) I also love just seeing water. The Mississippi river is so huge and I love the sound of the water.

So being away from my nest is not my forte. It makes me feel a little uncomfortable in all arenas. So needless to say I am ready to get on the plane tomorrow and see my mountains. That was one thing I noticed as I was flying away from the Rockies on Sunday it literally takes my breath away and makes me feel claustrophobic when I can't see the huge mountains and I feel like I just can't see what is around me.

So Colorado I can't wait to see you tomorrow. ;) Yeah you could say I am a home body :)

almost 2 weeks

without Diet Pepsi and heading strong...I am breaking the addiction and taking names:)

Working it

So my roomie has been doing the Daniel's fast which is essentially a vegan diet. Since this sista has some food issues being, turning into a toddler and throwing a fit when whatever I am craving (usually cheese;) is not in the fridge. With my hypoglycemia issues, people know that I can get a bit cranky when I don't eat ;)

So I decided not to do the fast but still give up something that was important to me.

So I gave up....DIET PEPSI!!!

I love diet pepsi, it surpasses my love for coffee. I mean literally the other week I got a can out and said out loud, "oh my love," and held the can to my face, A bit pathetic...yes:)So thus far I have made it 3.5 days and still trucking. Not only am I not having diet pepsi, but any soda. I did this for awhile in high school and college, but thought it was about time to be disciplined again.

AND...

I have decided to try running/being more healthy in general. So tuesday night I did the Jack Quinns run actually ran most of it even though the side aches felt like a knife in my side. I have been doing zumba and I'll blog about that later.

But I am trying to eat better and be more healthy and my muscles are sore, but it feels so good. Especially with being outside during the weather change, I love it. So today just do something. Get outside and move. Have fun and just laugh. Even if you get out of breath at first, continue to move. You can do it! It about simple choices everyday. I am trying to make more of those right choices. ;)

Coffee

My love affair with coffee began when I was in college. I used to be one of those people who couldn't stand the taste of coffee let alone the smell of it.

Then in college homework kicked in hard core, so as a result of being up late working on papers and having to get up early to go to classes and doing everything else I did in college I began drinking coffee. My brain was like ok missy we need to do something to counteract this tiredness, as alas the love affair began. At that point it wasn't quite a love affair more like obligation.

Then after college I began working at a group home when I NEVER got any sleep. I worked with kids who were about to age out of the system and dale house was the last stop for them to learn how to become an adult at the tender age of 18. These kids were getting out of jail or the human services system so needless to say living with them and having to be a parent/friend and making sure they didn't sneak out and do many other things was interesting.

So sleep was even more limited there, thus the obligation to coffee moves into strong like at this point.

Then I went from dale house right into law enforcement as a victim advocate. So we would be the second people to show up to a call/crime scene and assist the victims in whatever way needed. So that was process opened doors to katie seeing lots of things that no one can prepare for. This is when coffee and I turned our relationship serious, had a define the relationship talk and it became a love affair :)

Know I am a forensic interviewer for kids who have been abused and help out in criminal investigations and thus the coffee love affair continues.

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Recently I have been told that to really enjoy my coffee I need to grind the beans in a grinder every night so it doesn't bring the oil out of the beans when I get them all ground together and put them in the freezer.

So I have been waiting to get a grinder this week and every morning when I wake up this week have been looking at the bag of whole beans I have and no grinder.

They laugh at me, saying you know you want to drink me. I taste so good in your mouth. Laughing at me.

So today after about the 5th day of no good coffee I was desperate and went downstairs and talking to my friend at work about it and she said I will buy you whatever you want if you run to starbucks and get me my drink.

ok, I am game. So today went and got free coffee

then

my other friend at work brought me in a crossaint wich from BK,

What a great day!

Sweet Women

Today is my sweet sister's birthday.

She is such a sweet woman, good sister, wife and momma.

Jess, hope you feel loved today,

cause you are!

Yesterday was my momma's birthday.

All the things that I said about my sister can be said about my mom.

My mom is almost a saint.

No, seriously you don't understand.

This woman is incredible.

None the less, these women have made me the woman I am today.

Love ya both!

Strawberry or Butt chin

This was my strawberry I had for lunch and it seriously looked like a tooth or a butt chin to me.

What do you think?